In the interest of the public good, the following edict is hereby issued:
WHEREAS: beekeeping has been established as an activity of great monetary benefit to this community, considering the increased harvests of fruits, flowers, and vegetables that result from pollination by the honeybee (Apis mellifera), and
WHEREAS: beekeepers have been shown to be a bastion of rectitude in their fight to protect the species of Apis mellifera from the depredations of chemicals, predators, and weather, and
WHEREAS: said honeybees have had an uphill battle lately where said weather, predators, and chemicals are concerned,
THEREFORE, be it hereby known that from this date and heretofore, all persons not associated with an established hive of bees will, within the next thirty (30) days, be subject to a fine of $24,197.36 and imprisonment of not more than eighty (80) days, this amount being the estimated yearly value of a honeybee hive to the community.
If, THEREFORE, a citizen does not keep at least one hive of bees, said citizen will be expected to reimburse the community for the dollars lost to that community and to suffer such retribution as shall be deemed necessary, to wit—imprisonment for eighty (80) days. During said imprisonment, said prisoner shall be fed only those foods which have not resulted, either directly or indirectly, from the pollination activities of Apis mellifera, to wit: water. Chewing on wisps of hay will be allowed, since grasses are pollinated by the wind.
THIS DECREE issued in accordance with the laws of this state and this county and this nation on the first of April in the year 2011, and hereby attested to by Narf Trawets, Clerk of the Court.
signed by Narf Trawets 4/1/2011
BEEattitude for Day # 171:
Blessed are those who appreciate the value of us bees, for we shall refrain from stinging them.
One thing Fran is grateful for right now:
My good friend, Narf Trawets, born on this day. Happy Birthday, Narf!